Oct 28

Six Sentence Sunday 10/28 Edition

Slowly pressing Gabrielle’s body against the tree, she said, “You’re breathing really fast.”
“I know.”
“Are you scared?”
“No.”
“So your completely calm right now?”
“I never said that.”

Stay tuned for more excerpts from Unearthing Desire.

#SixSentenceSunday

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Oct 24

Autumn’s Bookshelf: “Jason to Jessica” by Starfox Howl

11934168“Jason Ryerson wakes from sleep in a different room and a different body. In the hour after waking up, he learns that he has been a victim twice over, first of a car accident that caused massive injuries to his old body. Secondly, and more devastatingly a victim of the MORFS plague. Jason, now Jessica, learns what it means to be on the other side of the bed. Outwardly a beautiful woman, she is forced to come to terms with how the world views women. As ties to her past are confronted, dissolved or strengthened, Jessica turns her attention to her future. A man who knew her as both Jason and now Jessica becomes more than just a friend. With no secrets between them, will he help her find her way into the world of being a woman?”

Okay, now that we got the promotional synopsis out of the way, here’s the dirt.

Starfox Howl writes a very interesting novel.  Its a sci-fi romance, much different from anything I have ever read. It is written from the perspective of Jason/Jessica.  We as readers are able to see inside her head and get a lot of knowledge about the character.  However, I felt like I was being told the story by a third party more than I felt like I was being told the story from Jessica herself.  It was like someone was using her voice to tell me a story that was about her.  It is hard to explain.  Being that I am not a huge sci-fi fan, I did find this book to be very interesting and enlightening for those who are into that kind of romantic fiction.  It did not draw me in ways that other books have.   I liked the book but for my bookshelf, it gets a Four Leaves rating.

4rating

 

For More Sci-fi with your Romance visit: http://StarfoxHowl.Blogspot.com

Up next The Cyberkink Sideshow by Ophidia Cox

Oct 21

Six Sentence Sunday 10/21 Edition

A rebel-with-a-cause.
The antithesis of her being.
The editor-in-chief.
Bane of her existence.
Thorn in her side.
There were so many phrases that Gabrielle wanted to use to describe her, but none did any justice short of majestic beauty.

 

Stay tuned for more excerpts from Unearthing Desire.

#SixSentenceSunday

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Oct 19

The Art of Sexting

Her: You know I want you intimately, sexually, intellectually, and yet you deny me.
Him: Me? I’d NEVER deny u!
Her: You deny my delicate folds the pleasure of feeling you penetrate their velvet walls
Him: Mmmmmm just slowly open them to me ….very slowly spread them..
Him: I wanna see marvel touch and taste EVERY part of u ….before I penetrate your entire being
Her: Feeling your hands tenderly cares my thighs. My panties melting off my body. Take me. Te necesito, Papi.

sexting-300x225A carefully worded text message of sexual, erotic, and sometimes explicit content. Who hasn’t done it? It all about creating mental images for your partners about the wonderful things you plan on doing to him or her later.  Mental stimulation from non traditional means like sexting, cyber chatting, etc. can be a powerful way to reconnect to your partner especially when the relationship has to exist at a distance.  Before engaging in this kind of endeavor, here are a few tips or tricks:

  • Don’t keep repeating the same phrase over and over. Be creative
  • Be as descriptive as possible when describing actions. “I’m going to carefully unhook your bra one by one with my teeth” sounds much better than “I’m going to remove your bra”
  • Don’t be afraid to be aggressive. Most people (male and female) like their partner to be aggressive from time to time.
  • Feel free to tease.  In this instance, the buildup is more than half the battle
  • Foreplay, foreplay, foreplay! It cannot be stressed enough!
  • Feel free to explore fantasies, test the waters, it’s just a tease.
  • Always double check your recipient number. You do not want to be sexting your mother.

There are no guarantees that this will work, but its worth a try. Every person is different and this just may spice up your sex life.

Oct 18

Autumn’s Bookshelf: “The Awakening” by Shakir Rashaan

“What goes on in the Palace, stays in the Palace…”
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The Awakening: Book One of the Chronicles of the Nubian Underworld is a journey inside Atlanta’s African-American Fetish community, and the ties that bind the principle players of this exciting new series. With its twists and turns and surprises along the way, it is sure to become an “awakening” for any who dare to journey to the “Dark side.”

Okay, now that we got the promotional synopsis out of the way, here’s the dirt. O….M….G Shakir Rashaan is an AMAZING author. I could not put it down. Now granted, there were some slow moments, which as an author are a necessary evil even in action packed books, but the book is definitely a page turner. It puts 50 Shades of Grey to shame. Anyone who is interested in kink should definitely give this book a try. It provides a fantasy but realistic view of things that actually happen in the “Nubian underworld.”

The entire time, I felt as if I was sitting and talking directly to Ramesses and Nefertiti. There is definitely a personable aspect to it. Either the author took a page from his own life story or he has definitely done his research. (From the afterward, I learned that some of it was directly from his life story.) I look forward to reading book two. With less than 5 areas where it may have had grammatical errors (I could have been reading the sentence wrong) in the entire novel of ~70,000 words, that’s over 99.99999% perfection!

Hands down: Five Leaves rating!

5rating

For more information, or to order his books, visit the link below!

 You can catch him also on Facebook or Twitter

Next week, Jason to Jessica by Starfox Howl

Oct 14

Six Sentence Sunday 10/14 Edition

Pause. Gabrielle had to think for a moment.  This was a woman not a man.  A female. A feminine species of human. These thoughts went against everything that Gabrielle as taught and knew to be right and moral.

Stay tuned for more excerpts from Unearthing Desire.

#SixSentenceSunday

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Oct 07

NaNoWriMo 2012

You have this great idea for a book. People would flock to the shelves to read it. Guaranteed “New York Times” best seller, you say.  But you can’t get past page one.  You put in the desk to revisit it. But when becomes the question. That’s where NaNoWriMo (Nano) comes in.
nano_12_winner_detailNational Novel Writing Month is sponsored by Office of Letters and Light.  For thirty days, people across the globe commit to writing a fifty thousand word novel.  As a writer, Nano is a great way to finish an idea that was started. For even the best of writers, it can be hard to move forward past the first 250 words of a novel.  Come this November, it has gotten that much easier.  As a follow up to National Book Month in October, what better way to show one’s love and appreciation for the written word than by writing something.  Even if it’s bad, at the end, you can say you wrote a novel.

Congrats, novelist.

30 days.

50,000 words.

One you.

Make it happen!

Oct 05

“Little Brown Boy’s Blues”: An interview with Tuan N’Gai

Recently, I undertook writing a book. Being the person that I am, I set out to do a little research on some characters.  I got to sit down and do an exclusive interview with a friend of mine, Tuan N’Gai.

So I took a moment to sit down with Tuan and get his take on non-heterosexual relationships, religion/spirituality, and the black community.

 

ME: Namaste, my brother.

TUAN: Namaste.

ME: So, I wanted to ask you about your relationships. I want to talk about being a non-heterosexual black male.

TUAN:  Okay. Ask away.

ME: In the book that I am writing, one of the main characters is out and the other isn’t in regards to their sexuality. Have you ever dated someone like that, who wasn’t completely comfortable with his sexuality? If so what was the relationship like? What problems did you encounter?

TUAN:  Yes. Most church boys are “in the life, but not out”. For me it was not really a bad experience sexually, but socially and spiritually, it was frustrating. I didn’t like being referred to as “friend” when we were definitely more. Going to the movies and sitting 2 or more seats apart, not being able to sit on the same side of the table when we were out to dinner, not that I’m all about PDA, but if we’re a couple I think we should be able to act like it. Each one ultimately ended because I wasn’t able or willing to continue being the dirty little secret.

ME: For lack of better phrasing do you identify as top/bottom/vers? I hope this is not too personal.

TUAN:  Vers/bottom. Bottom that loves to eat among other things (laughs)

ME: I am so excited for this book. I feel that it can be really good. It touches on different themes like spirituality, sexuality, minority views on sex/relationships/spirituality and non traditional relationships.  For example, I know what its like to come out and deal as a bisexual woman and as a homosexual woman, but what was it like for you coming out?

TUAN:  For me coming out was scary. I did it on my 30th birthday when I released my first book. Then I said it during an interview on national television.

ME: What was the “aftermath”? How did your family take it?

TUAN:  For me, I became a black Christian LGBT leader. My family had to deal with a lot of questions and social feedback. I think people always knew, but didn’t say anything because my family is very prominent in my hometown. Once I came out, it gave everyone license to ask questions like “what are you gonna do? How do you feel about…? I don’t know how you could deal with…” Me and my parents didn’t talk for almost 2 years after that.

ME: Do you have any siblings? Any brothers?

TUAN:  I have one sister with whom I was raised, and my biological father who didn’t bother has 2 sons, one older and one younger than me

ME: So what was your relationship like with your father (who raised you)?

TUAN:  My stepfather taught me everything I know about being a strong black man. I love him dearly. He was very distant though, spoiled us with things, not affection. Me and my baby sister were treated the same. He wasn’t emotionally available for either of us

ME: Do you feel you were overly socialized to be or criticized for not being “traditionally” masculine enough?

TUAN:  My dad was the first one to call me a sissy. When other little boys ridiculed me for being a little fem, it really didn’t hurt. They knew not to f**k with me. I have a whole lot of cousins and most are crazy.

ME: (laughs) What was that situation like with your dad?

TUAN:  Well, I remember sitting it front of the television watching “American Bandstand” while my other cousins were outside playing football. He said, “Why don’t you go outside and play instead of laying up in the house like a sissy?” I didn’t know at that time what “sissy” was, but I knew because of his tone it wasn’t a good thing in his opinion

ME: Interesting!  What were you’re reactions, thoughts, or feelings when you did find out about what it meant to be a sissy?

TUAN:  When I found out what it was, I thought “that’s me” but I didn’t feel like anything was wrong with it until they (my parents) started showing me the bible verses that supposedly prohibit being homosexual. I just knew I liked playing with girls, but I LIKED little boys

ME: So did you “try/force” yourself to be heterosexual? Or did you just accept that you were different?

TUAN:  I tried, but I always knew it wouldn’t work. I’ve been engaged to be married, truly love her, but we both knew I wouldn’t be able to fight who I am.

ME: What was that like to be engaged but knowing fundamentally it wasn’t being true to yourself?

TUAN:  I have even had sex with women, but it was like work.  At that time I felt I was doing “the right thing,” but I knew it would end horribly. She loved me enough to force me to be honest

ME: So, what are things like with your partner/boyfriend/etc now?

TUAN:  We’ve had talks about our feelings. We still love each other deeply. He said he feels I’m on an extended business trip, but we aren’t “broken up.” We are both in the same boat, not dating anyone, missing one another.

ME: I understand. I kind of want to ask do you find your relationships to be different from heterosexual relationships (aside from the fact that its two guys and not a man and a woman).  I mean on a fundamental level; I know it’s not different. But are there things that you find different in homosexual relationships?

TUAN:  I think the men understand each other better, so the whole war about communication isn’t much of an issue.

ME: Have you noticed the same in female-female relationships? In terms of energy, does one person tend to dominate and the other less so? Is one person more masculine energy and the other more feminine energy?

TUAN:  That all depends on the men. In my relationship, we were both all man as it were. We had to learn how to balance the power, how to be strong when the other was feeling weak, how to trust your partner not to take advantage when you are vulnerable.

ME: Do you feel that non-heterosexual men have more hesitation about being vulnerable than heterosexual men in relationships for fear of being taken advantage of?

TUAN:  The ones who have suffered emotional and spiritually damaging relationships, yes. Most of the time, I think non-hetero men are more willing to be vulnerable than hetero because we tend to feel deeper.

ME: So being a spiritual leader, how do you combat people who say that it’s against Christian values to be non-heterosexual?

TUAN:  I tell them that the term “Christian” means “follower of The Christ” and The Christ never said anything judgmental or other wise about homosexuals. They should follow suit. In fact, if Jesus were here today, he’d probably surround himself with marginalized people, including The “Geighs.smile

ME: (Laughs) So, what about the references to the Old Testament scriptures in Leviticus and the New testament Scriptures in Timothy?

TUAN: Those scriptures are often prohibitions of temple prostitution and sexual religious rituals that were deemed idolatrous. Neither the Hebrew nor Greek had a term for “homosexual” at the time those books were written.

ME: So they are possible interjections of those translating the scriptures? Leviticus (if I am not mistaken) says that man shall not lie with a man that is an abomination.

TUAN: Yes, the transliteration of that scripture in Leviticus reads “man should not lie with a man in the bed of a woman, it’s an abomination.” In the Hebrew custom, women had separate beds. When it was their time of month, they were put outside the camp until they were considered clean again. Their clothes, bodies, even their beds were considered unclean, and men were not to touch them. Furthermore, in the New Testament, it says we are no longer under the law because Christ fulfilled it. If the law was “fulfilled: meaning completed” why are we still holding on to that one law?

ME: Touché, good friend, touché. In Timothy people say that a marriage “is defined as being between one man and one woman.”

TUAN: True, in biblical times, women were property not partners. Marriage was something totally different from what it is today. That rule doesn’t apply.

ME: How do you feel about marriage vs. civil unions?

TUAN: To me, it doesn’t matter, as long as I have equal rights, privileges and protections under the law, I’m cool.

ME: There are those who feel that marriage is a religious institution, and we should do away with the legalization of marriage and institute domestic partnerships/civil unions that aren’t based on sex. How would you respond to that?

TUAN: I’d be all for it, as long as every domestic partnership was seen as equal.

ME: If there was something that you could impart upon people about the reality of non-heterosexual relationships that dispels myths what would it be?

TUAN: I’d ask, “what do you think homos do that heteros don’t?” that usually gets them to thinking. The only difference in the two types of relationships is homos can’t physically procreate. Other than that, we are the same.

ME: (Laughs) If only humans were hermaphrodites….

TUAN: THANK YOU!!! (Laughs)

ME: How can people reach you or buy your books?

TUAN: They can reach and find links to the books on www.operationrebirth.com or www.tuanngai.com.  I can be emailed at tngai@operationrebirth.com for those who have more questions.

ME: Well thank you for taking the time to sit down and talk with me. I appreciate the opportunity

TUAN: It was my pleasure.

Tuan N’Gai is a native of Wichita Falls, Texas.  He was groomed from an early age to pursue excellence in ministry and community service. Tuan is the Founder of Tuan N’Gai Enterprises, and Co-Founder the Operation: REBIRTH movement and the author/publisher of the internationally acclaimed books, “Will I Go To Heaven? The Black Gay Spiritual Dilemma” and “Little Brown Boy’s Blues.” He is also a contributor to the New York Times Best Seller, “It Gets Better: Coming Out, Overcoming Bullying, and Creating a Life Worth Living.”  As an author and publisher, Tuan has traveled extensively spreading the message of God’s all-inclusive love, and the need for equality and social justice.  He has been a featured guest on television and radio talk shows across the country, and his writings have been featured in nationally known publications.

Among his many business ventures, he is regarded a leader in the fight for social justice and equality for all marginalized people.  Tuan is noted for being a driving force in ending spiritual violence and homophobia perpetrated by mainstream religious organizations.  He has organized successful demonstrations to bring an end to bullying, domestic violence and domestic abuse.  He has also been instrumental in planning large conferences and festivals.

You can find his books at “Little Brown Boy’s Blues” and “Will I Go To Heaven? The Black Gay Spiritual Dilemma” for Kindle © or see his website for hard copies.
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Oct 02

Podcasting 101: The Conception

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You have great ideas. You want to share them with the world. You decide to do a podcast but are unsure of how to do it? I have been there. I know the sense of dread you feel. Here are some of the technological advancements and gadgets that you can use.

Podcasting is in its definition: portable, on-demand broadcasting. The purpose of the podcast is to provide relevant information to people in a portable video or audio format that they can take with them. This can be in many forms and I will break them down for you in a moment. There are several ways for a person to create a podcast and relate it to the world. The two main ways are: 1. BlogTalk Radio (or some other similar website) or 2. Independently record and produce a podcast on your own. Each one has its advantages and disadvantages.

BlogTalk Radio (BTR)

This is good for people who are focused on reaching people as quickly and inexpensively as possible. It also is great for people who are new to broadcasting and want to get into the podcast realm relatively easily. This type of set up uses a phone line and a computer with a reliable internet connection. The broadcaster uses a phone to call in and broadcast to people over the internet and also guest or commentate can listen via phone or the broadcaster’s link. This is a rather simple interface. It is free for up to 30 minutes a day. BlogTalk radio hosts the content on their server and it is downloadable by virtually anyone. The biggest disadvantage is that this is only 30 minutes of radio a day. Now if you want more than that you can pay for up to 6 hours a day but you can only record once a day. BTR has additional fe
atures that can be supported if you want to pay for them as well.

Independently record and produce a podcast on your own

This is good for people who want to have a high degree of control and creativity over their podcast. It is also great for people who are more experienced, have their own websites, and are focused on quality. This type of set up is contingent on how you actually want to record your podcast. It can be as simple as a USB microphone, ear buds, and a recording interface on your computer or as complex as using several microphones, a mixer, studio headphones, audio interfaces, and more. Each set up is contingent on your needs. In another article, I go over the individual equipment for independent recording. The down side of this is the amount of production time, technical education, and startup costs incurred. For some, it’s as simple as a new laptop and some free software, for others it may require a studio in their home office. It can range from a little to a lot. The biggest difference is that the actual audio is maintained on your hosting company’s server and you as a podcast professional are responsible for making sure it is available to the public to listen or download. This may require some technical experience and expertise.

Overall, your needs largely are contingent on your goals and personal experience. If you are like me, don’t be afraid to try both. Many podcasters used BTR to build a following then migrated to their own server when they were ready. It’s up to you as far as what you feel is going to be right for your needs.

Oct 01

The Vulva Dialogue

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Its the “down there,” the “special place,” the “you know,” or the “kitty,” some of the random expressions used to refer to or speaking about the feminine sex. The sometimes seemingly awkward nature in which people talk about the vulva. It gives off this deep seeded impression that its something similar to a black hole, vast and empty space. Women are usually so embarrassed that they disconnect themselves from it and make a conscious effort to try to disassociate it with the rest of the body. But why is that? Is it that it represents some deep dark discontent with ourselves? Or is it something more?

There are many reasons women disassociate themselves from owning the beauty of the vulva; some of which date back to the foundations of religion. In addition to the messages women receive from media, family, friends and even ourselves regarding our own vulvas, women are not always the most empowering. Society propagate the sentiment that the vulva is this dirty thing that needs to be cleansed of its filth, as evident by all the feminine hygiene products on the market. When people are constantly being inundated with such messages, how is it that people aren’t ashamed of the vulva? If you took the time to talk to your vulva what would the conversation look like?

Would your conversation go like this:
“Hello, old friend, how are you today?”
“I am fine, a little lonely. Where have you been?”
“Work, school, kids, life. You know the routine.”
“That I do. But it doesn’t mean you can’t take a few minutes every now and again to reconnect? I’ve missed the good times we shared.”
“True, but I’m usually just so tired. That by time it comes around, I just don’t feel like it.”
“I understand.”

Or more like this:
“Hello, old friend, how are you today?”
“I am tired. I pulled a double last night?”
“Wow, sounds exhausting. How are you holding up?”
“Same ole, same ole. You know the routine. I just wish I didn’t feel so disconnected every time.”

Or maybe even like this:
“Help, someone, I just want to be loved!”

American society has always held and promoted a shameful view of sex, sexual relations, and sexual relationships. People are not comfortable in their own skin to have frank conversations about what it is that they want and need sexually, emotionally, and spiritually in order to form healthy attachments to others. So many women are settling for who is available instead of being with someone who truly values the entirety of the women which includes the vulva.

So when was the last time you had a vulva dialog? What would she say? Would she lament about how lonely she is? Would she cry out for attention? Would she express how overused and tired she is? Would she beg for a rest? When was the last time you took the time to have a healthy and frank conversation with her? When was the last time you took time out to praise her? Explore her intricacies and uniqueness? Would you even recognize her on the street? Are you close friends or distant strangers? Many people are surprised at the beauty that is in the flower. It holds for many not just the beauty of sex, but the secrets of life.

Its time for people to be proud of the inner beauty that is in the vulva. Embrace its power and glory. When we as a society stop being fearful and shameful of its existence, we can move forward from this stagnant backwards views of sexuality and move forward in to a positive destiny.

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